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  I sat huddled in that cubicle for what felt like hours being forced to listen to those women talk in graphically disturbing detail about my Joe. Setting the scene for every sexual encounter they had each experienced with him, and adding in a few they’d only heard about on the grapevine. They told me everything leaving no detail out. I felt traumatised and at a loss for what to do. My absence at the table would be noticed by now and I couldn’t stand the thought that Joe may come looking for me and wander into this shit show. I heard a distant wave of claps and assumed the speeches had started.

  Right on cue the women finished up and exited the ladies room in the same garish way they had entered, shrieking and howling like a pack of wolves. When I was one hundred percent certain that the coast was clear I tentatively unlocked the door and peaked out. The ladies room was empty now apart from me and the perfume lady. I hoped she wouldn’t join in and tell me her Joe story!

  “Stuck up bitches.” She said and gave me a sympathetic smile. She must have known why I was hiding. I smiled sadly across to her, washed my hands and then dug some money out of my purse to pass to her. She went to give me some products but I shook my hand and crept out of the ladies with an air of shame around me.

  I saw a waiter walking in the opposite direction to the one that I had come from. He was heading away from the main hall and all the drama that was gathering there like a storm. I didn’t know what I was doing, but I knew I couldn’t stay here a moment longer than I had to.

  “Excuse me, could you help me? Please?” I pleaded.

  He walked over to me a look of concern etched onto his face.

  “Are you okay?”

  “No, I need to get out of here as quickly as I can, I can’t let anyone in there see me. I can’t go out there or through the main doors either. Do you know of a back entrance to the building that you could sneak me out of?” I was begging now, my eyes must have looked desperate because he didn’t hesitate, just nodded his head to a door down the corridor and led me down there.

  We walked through the busy, bustling kitchens, past chefs cooking up all sorts, flames flying up and people milling about everywhere. No one batted an eye lid that we were walking through here. I was relieved to be invisible to everyone right now. He led me to a door that came out to a car park area, probably for the staff car park judging by the type of cars that were parked here.

  “The main road is just round the corner there Ma’am, will you be okay or would you like me to call you a cab?” He asked.

  “I’ll be okay, thank you so much. I’m really grateful for your help.”

  He smiled and turned back to the kitchen to carry on with his working evening. I speed walked my way to the main road and saw a line of taxis parked up ahead ready to ferry me away from the hell behind me. I jumped in one and gave them Robyn’s address. Then I sent a text off to Robyn to ask her if it was okay if I crashed at hers tonight. I powered off my mobile so my tracker app wouldn’t work, I still hadn’t figured out how to disable the damn thing. Then I sat back, and let the tears flow freely down my cheeks. So much for feeling like a princess, I felt like the biggest fool right now.

  Those women must have thought I was such a naïve clueless little girl, walking into that building full of vipers, with no idea what they all thought about me. Not knowing whose arm I was walking in on and giving out such false bravado. No wonder he hadn’t wanted to go, it was his blooding hunting ground, his personal domain to turn up to, and pick one or two of them for a night of dirty fucking, and I’d turned up to spoil all their fun.

  19

  ​“What the hell are you doing here?” Chris was opening the front door before I was even half way up the path, a look of shock and exasperation on his pretty boy face.

  ​“Shit happened and… I can’t cope anymore Chris.” I burst into tears and he ran down to put his arms around me and give me a huge cuddle. I instantly soaked his shoulder through with my tears as he walked me inside, sat me down on the sofa and rocked me. Robyn came over with a cup of tea, but I wrinkled my nose up at the smell of it.

  ​“What’s up boo? You don’t like tea anymore? It always helped before?”

  ​“I’ve gone off it since the baby.” I said not thinking and Robyn gasped putting her hand on her chest in shock.

  ​“Ella are you pregnant? Oh my fucking God! Are you?” I nodded and starting sobbing more.

  ​“Bloody hell Elle, what’s going on? Please don’t tell me he’s thrown you out because of that. If he has he is the biggest shit in the entire universe. I’ll kill him!”

  ​“No, he doesn’t know and I don’t want him to yet. Definitely not after tonight.”

  ​“What happened Babe? You both looked so loved up when I left you.” Chris asked his eyes showing how protective he was of me. He stroked my hair now making me feel like a little girl.

  ​“It was all going… fine I suppose, the people there were weirdos, pretentious rich twats, you know the type.” They both nodded. “Joe was his usual attentive self, sweet talking me and taking care of me, checking I was alright every few minutes. I know why now though don’t I.” I took a deep breath in and then it all spilt out.

  ​“I had to stand in a cubicle in the ladies and listen to a group of women describe in graphic detail how they had all fucked Joe, in various places and positions. I heard every gory detail about what he did to them and they did to him.” I slumped forward and put my head in my hands.

  “He’s a whore, it’s that simple and I don’t know if I can live with that. I walked into the vipers’ nest tonight, without a clue what I was letting myself in for. He used to use nights like tonight to hunt for women like them. How am I supposed to get my head around that?”

  ​“Oh Hun it must have been awful for you. I can’t even imagine, but you’ve got a baby to think about now. You’re gonna have to deal with this at some point. You can’t run away and avoid him forever.” Robyn was right.

  ​“I know I can’t avoid him forever, but I just need some time to think without all the drama. My head is all over the place as it is thinking about the baby, I can’t deal with this as well, not right now.”

  ​“Does he know you heard all that?” Chris asked.

  ​“No, I left the ladies room and ran out the back door of the venue. I couldn’t face anyone let alone Joe.”

  ​“You mean you’ve done a runner and left him there in the vipers’ nest? Christ Ella, that’s a bit shitty don’t you think?”

  ​I hadn’t thought about Joe in all this, I was too preoccupied with getting away from the witches and staying away. I’d made a massive error I knew it, but it was done now, I had to stand by it.

  ​“I’m gonna be a single Mum aren’t I.” I gasped as the realisation dawned on me that he may never change.

  What if he had cheated on me already? I couldn’t bear to think about it so I closed my mind off and tried to think about what life would be like as a single Mum. Could I still work? Who would take care of the baby whilst I was at work? How would I cope on those long nights when the baby wouldn’t sleep? Then I sadly thought, no one else will ever want me now, I’m damaged goods, a single Mum with baggage.

  Robyn and Chris sat either side of me letting me wallow in my self-pity and showing me they were there for me always. At least this baby would have the best Aunty and Uncle in the world, even if their Mum was a complete and total mess.

  We sat together like that for about an hour, trying to watch some TV drama about a bodyguard but neither one of us having the concentration span to follow the plot. I was about to call it a night and head upstairs to the comfort of my old bed when an almighty banging sounded on the front door.

  “No prizes for guessing who this is.” Robyn said as she rose from the sofa to open the door.

  “Please tell me she’s here.” Joe begged in a terrified voice.

  “Yes, she’s here.” Robyn replied, opening the door wider so he could see me sat on the sofa behind the door.

  “Thank God
.” He groaned dipping his head down then taking a large breath before entering the living room.

  “We’ll leave you two to it, come on Chris we can finish watching this upstairs in my room.” They gave me a supportive hug before disappearing upstairs. I just sat staring at the floor, I couldn’t bring myself to look at him.

  “What the fuck is going on Ella? You can’t just take off like that, not when there’s some crazy out there threatening to cause you harm. I thought you’d been taken. I was going out of my fucking mind! You turned your phone off, I couldn’t track you. What the hell Ella, talk to me.”

  I shook my head and struggled to find the words, any words to tell him how I felt.

  “I couldn’t stay there. I just couldn’t.”

  “Why? What happened?” He sat down cautiously next to me. “One minute everything seemed fine, you went off to the ladies and I didn’t see you again. Wendy went looking for you, but she couldn’t find you anywhere. I was worried sick Ella, and I couldn’t leave because I had to go up on stage and accept that damn award. I gave a speech to a room of my peers and God knows what I actually said because all I could concentrate on was you. I had Sam out on the streets looking for you, trying to find any indication of where you might have been. You disappeared into thin air. I thought you’d been taken.”

  I could sense the despair in him, but any sympathy I might have had towards him was buried deep under the weight of the lurid encounters I’d heard about and envisioned that evening.

  “I left through the back door. I didn’t want to stay. I couldn’t.”

  “You’ve already said that. Why couldn’t you stay? Why couldn’t you send me a text or call to let me know what was going on? Christ just letting Sam know you were leaving would have at least been something. What have I done Ella, for you to leave me like that?”

  “I’m sure your harem were pleased when I left.”

  He ran his hands over his face and sighed, “Is that what this is all about? Did one of them say something to you?”

  “Not one of them, all of them.” My anger was bubbling up now. I turned to him to stare into his eyes and show him how furious I was.

  “Why didn’t you tell me you were taking me into the vipers’ nest? I felt like a lamb to the slaughter having to navigate my way through your hunting ground.”

  “What happened Ella? You have to tell me, right now I’ve no idea what I’m trying to put right here.”

  “I don’t think you can put it right Joe.”

  “Well it would be nice if you gave me a bloody chance woman.”

  I snapped then, “Don’t turn this around on me. I haven’t done anything wrong.”

  “And obviously I have, so come on, out with it, what have I done now?”

  “Oh nothing new, you’re still just a massive whore that I can’t trust.”

  He growled in anger and turned to me holding my shoulders in place so I wouldn’t look away.

  “I haven’t cheated on you ever, if that’s what this is all about.”

  “I’m not so sure, after what I’ve heard tonight.”

  “And what is that exactly?”

  “That you’d fucked every woman in that bloody building, apart from Wendy. I bet even the waiting staff have had a go.”

  “Oh my God!” He stood up and started pacing the floor, running his fingers through his hair in exasperation. “Who told you this?” I noticed he wasn’t denying it.

  “A group of women did, in the bathroom. They were quite put out that I’d turned up tonight. Seems they were all looking forward to another round of fucks with you.”

  “I have no idea what you heard Ella, and quite frankly I don’t think I want to. There might have been some exes there….”

  “Some? SOME? Try all of them. They stood there sharing details about what you’d done to them, what they’d done to you. Christ Joe, I was sat in the cubicle you’d christened with the one bitch from last time you’d been there. Do you have any idea how humiliating it was to have to sit and listen to them talk about you like that?”

  “About as humiliating as watching another guy propose to your girlfriend in front of a packed pub on fireworks night?”

  “Grow up, that was just a joke, you can’t even compare the two things. At least you didn’t have to hear Adam give you a blow by blow account of our sex life. Tell me what would you do if he told you, shared favourite positions and stuff like that? What he used to like to do to me!”

  “I’d kill him.”

  “So how do you think I felt hearing all that about you? It made me feel sick Joe. They must have been looking at me all night thinking what a push over I was. The stupid air head who had come to the event on your arm having no clue whatsoever that every other woman there had been intimate with you at some point.” I started to cry now, I couldn’t stop.

  “I don’t know if I can live with your history anymore, I can’t stand the thought of all those women.”

  My tears were flowing fast now, and he put his arms around me to pull me into him. I tried to pull back, but he was so warm and familiar. I just wanted him to make it all go away.

  “I hate my past. I hate what it does to you, how it hurts you. I’m so sorry Ella.” He sat down again looking mournful. “I didn’t know you were out there in the world, waiting for me. If I had known I would meet you, find you, I’d never have touched another woman. I didn’t even know you existed. When I met you it all fell into place. The way I’d been back then wasn’t living, I was existing. But with you I live, I love you Ella, you give my life meaning. I’ve never had that before. Please don’t let what I was before I met you ruin what we have now.” He lifted my chin up and wiped the tears from my cheeks.

  “I would never ever cheat on you Ella. I love you too much. I know I haven’t been a good man, but I want to be a good man, a better man for you. I want everything for you, with you. I want to be a good husband and maybe a father one day. I want to have the family I never had growing up, with you Ella. If I could take back the past I would but I can’t.”

  “I hate that they think they have a right to you. I hate them talking about you like that. You’re mine. Not theirs.”

  “I am yours Ella, forever. I promise you I will do whatever I can to keep my past away from you in the future.” He sighed, “I fucked up big style tonight, I should have seen something like this coming. But I need you to remember it’s me and you now, that’s all that matters, no one else. You are my world Ella. Please don’t leave me.”

  “I can’t leave you.” I pouted. “I wouldn’t last a day.” I sobbed and flung my arms around his shoulders to hold him to me as tight as I could.

  He picked me up and sat me in his lap, brushing my curls out of my face and kissing my forehead, cheeks and nose.

  “I’m yours and you’re mine. That’s the truth. There will be people out there who try to come between us, who get jealous of what we have, but we need to hold onto that truth, to keep us strong.”

  “I think I love you too much.” I grinned through my tears.

  “That’s not possible.” He smiled and rubbed his nose against mine. Then delicately he kissed me, soft gentle kisses that became more urgent, more demanding.

  I sat astride him and deepened the kiss, my arms around his shoulders, hands running through his hair, grabbing, twisting, wanting. He moved his hands down to my ass and squeezed me. I could feel how hard he was, he felt as desperate as I did.

  Suddenly he pulled back holding my shoulders firm and looking deep into my eyes with his glittering grey eyes. We were both panting our breath mingling together and our faces inches from each other.

  “We can’t do this here. I want you, but not here with those two upstairs. Please can I take you home?” He asked. I nodded eagerly.

  “I just need to let Robyn and Chris know I’m leaving.” I lifted myself off his lap and went upstairs to let them know we were working things out.

  “I’m so relieved for you Ella. Are you going to tell him your other ne
ws?”

  “Not yet. One hurdle at a time is all I can manage right now.” I smiled.

  When I got back downstairs Joe was standing in the middle of the living room with his hands in his trouser pockets looking like an angel, my angel sent from heaven just for me. He looked up at me lovingly as I descended the stairs.

  “I never even got to dance with my princess tonight.” He sighed.

  “We can dance when we get home champ.” I replied. Holding my hand out to him and heading for the door.

  “I want more than a dance from you beautiful girl.”

  “Well, that goes without saying.”

  20

  The air in the car was thick with desire, we were both desperate to repair the cracks that had appeared tonight because of those vile witches. Joe was holding my hand, but that touch alone was making me yearn for him more, I could feel myself pulsing and growing wet for him. His own breathing was deep and erratic, he felt exactly the same.

  Suddenly he swerved the car to the left and darted down an unfamiliar road away from the direction of the apartment. He navigated us through streets I’d never been down before then out onto narrow dark country lanes. Soon we were heading in the direction of his favourite spot, the common.

  He pulled up to the wooded secluded area and parked under some trees with low lying branches offering us that much needed privacy.

  “In the back now.” He demanded.

  I unclicked my seat belt and slowly turned around in my seat. I took deep breaths in to steady myself but my heart was beating right out of my chest. As I reached up to hold onto the head rest of my seat and pull myself up and over to the back of the car, he slid his hands to the back of my dress and pulled the zip all the way down to the bottom. I looked deep into his eyes and saw the depths of his feelings for me. This was going to be brutal, intense and oh so satisfying.